I am back . . .

 

Friday, December 18, 2020

Hello everyone still out there.

I just wanted to drop in to wish a Happy Holidays to all and hopefully, a better New Year to come. . .

It has been a rather sporadic blog for me recently, as far as writing experiences. For the last ten years, I have been caring for my sick wife. She passed on, a year and nine months ago at this point. That has been a hard path, however, I believe us to be spiritual beings more than physical. Death is never easy, especially when you have been with someone for half of your life. My beliefs have helped me none the less.

Another thing that had tended to keep me away from regularly posting to the blog was the purchase of Blogger by Google, now a long time ago. But, it caused me trouble anyway if for no other reason, that I had to change my login ID from my original non-Google email address to a Google email. Normally, that would have made things easier. But, I was not allowed to use my preexisting main Google email address.

So, when I wanted to do something with this blog, I had to log out of my main Google ID, log back in as my alternate Google email address, then go to the blog to work. And when done, remember to do the process in reverse to get to my main Google email ID.

Sure it was easy, but also a pain to remember to do. And a pain to not be able to figure a way around it.

Now, I have a fix. And it is good for the blog because I had been thinking I would have to move it to another site that was simpler for me to get into.

So, I hope to have more material to add next year.

I will see you out there . . .

The first thing is that you all should know that you are much more than your physical body.

I have had many strange OOBEs since the last time I have written in this blog. They are important to me, but none as important as this one, and a few that follow, that happened a few months ago.

Saturday, February 17, 2018

From my journal

Last night Ava introduced herself to me by name. OK, I am not sure how she spells it. That is how it sounded. Yes, I said sounded. I spoke to “her.” It happened in what seemed like an OOBE, but really was a different sensation too.

The first time I noticed it, I had been awake for a couple of hours after sleeping normally for four hours. I felt as if someone was there with me. I thought I saw something, but when I asked if anyone was there (thinking the question) the only thing I was aware of was an intense feeling of pre-OOBE sensations. Then it faded for a few minutes.

When the sensations suddenly returned, I mentally asked if anyone was there, again. This time, I heard my voice clearly in my head on the right side as I thought the words. I heard my voice say the words as if it was directed to my right ear. I heard a response in my left ear, saying, “Yes, I am here.” It sounded like a feminine voice, very tiny and distant, but understandable. I asked who it was? It responded, "I am Ava.” I asked if I knew them, and the response was "Not in any way that would easily be explained." I asked why it was here if it could not explain who it was. It responded, "I want you to know that I care about you.”

OK. This may be out there, even for me. A non-physical intelligence named Ava who is connected to me in a way I might not understand, wanted me to know she was there, and that she cares about me.

Ages ago, when the OOB experiences started to happen to me, I had an entity visit who spoke to me in the same manner. See post titled Confrontation. It had not happened since then. Could it be that this voice was of the same entity who spoke to me when I was younger?

Since that earlier time I have had “meetings” with teacher figures who had been tall thin males with hoods and beards, carrying staffs- the typical archetype image for spiritual teachers. This early contact was a glowing ball of energy. Last night I did not see anything, although I sensed a presence prior to the contact. The voice both times was similar, although at this point, the first time seems ages ago.

Life gets odd.  

Here, an experiment to try to write Ava's response to questions I have. 

Friday, February 23, 2018, Ava's responses are indented in all that follows. 

Hello Ava

I think you are there- I feel it. Can you type through me?

Can you explain anything about your relationship to me?

Would writing by hand be any easier?

I think I feel your presence, but I am not sure how to do this.

I am with you. It is not easy to understand how this is working. It is outside my knowledge. 

Can you tell me who you are to me? What is our relationship?

You start with the hardest question to answer, although it seems the most basic one.

That is how I usually do it. You seemed to jump right in when I was very young. That was a lot to grasp and understand for one as young as I was at the time.

This way of communication will take time to be proficient. Even as an untrained typist, you are so much better equipped since this is the way you have been raised. It is easy for you, and to me is most forigne. It is not really exactly me typing, but your translating the thoughts I am giving to you. ,aybe I will try it again later. Goodbye for now.

Saturday, February 24, 2018

Hello, again Ava.

I feel like I should correct the mistyped words in the entry above since I know this is not your usual way to communicate. And I know I if was a better typist too, it would be easier for both of us.

Ava, are you here with me? I do not sense you are, but I know you are never far.

Ending attempt now- Related to my question above, I have been glancing at a book I read more than 45 years ago attributed to an entity called Seth, give through contact with the author Jane Roberts. In this work, there is a sketch of Seth that looks a lot like someone I saw in an experience of mine who told me his name was Seth. I know it is just a coincidence, and yet it also could be that it was meant as a pointer for me to look back at this book, The Seth Material and Seth Speaks one more time.

Since I am not feeling any response from you today, I will end this for now. I will try some other time.   

Monday, February 26, 2018

I say hello to Ava, and I acknowledge feeling an immediate response.

I am not sure if Ava is onboard with the computer. Sometimes it even gives me trouble. But, I do sense that her actually speaking to me as she did earlier, is reserved for special contact.

Yesterday I had a brief thought while the Ava sensation was flowing in me, that my “spirit name” could be Liam. The sensation when I questioned if I was correct in thinking this was strong and immediate, suggesting that it was a correct interpretation.  In terms of what this is as a name meaning, one suggestion on the internet is Resolute Protector. As far as spirit names go, it would indeed be one of strength. I could do worse.

Ava, I will open this means of contact up to you if you are comfortable attempting it. As you can tell by my re-types and spelling corrections, even my comfort level in typing is not unlimited. You might possibly end up being a better typist than I am. Therefore, I will not be overly critical of your attempts. As long as I can recognize your intent, I can correct it later.

Ava, do you have anything to say? How about an explanation of the universe and how it is set up?

            I could do that, but maybe we should start with something easier. 

(Not her typing, but a thought I had of her answer)

OK, Ava, How did I get the name, Liam?

            It is the overall sum of your personalities. It is the best approximation of who you are         overall and as you say above, it is a very strong name. It was not always the case with you. It has been as you might say a long strange trip to get here. This is true of course for anyone in their development. There are starts and stops along the way. We try the best we can in any experience to grow- to use every opportunity for growth we can to get from a start to the finish.

OK. Thank you. I have to end this now.

Thursday, March 1, 2018

I had intended to write again before now, but have been busy with other life concerns.

Ava, I know you are never far from me, and even saying that I acknowledge that I feel a response from you. Unless you have anything pressing for me, I do not really have time to talk to you right now. And I do not want to rush this.

Feeling no response at this time, I am off to other things. I do have a feeling Ava has more to say, even though writing this is not her primary reason to communicate with me.

Saturday, March 3, 2018

Last week I had a dream after trying to project to Ava during an OOBE. I was stopped, and later had a dream of showing up to a test and being told that I was not ready to pass the test because I was incomplete. After thinking about that, I wrote this.

Here is my evaluation of the dream of a life test. It is not so much any specific upcoming test as I had thought, but a suggestion that the test is this entire life as it is. I had tried to go back to Ava and was shut down. The dream portrayed me being told that I had could not finish the test because I was “incomplete”. Once I am finished with the current life, the evaluation as to my being complete enough to return to Ava will happen.

A few days later, I had a dream I was in a classroom setting, where I was sitting with a student explaining to him that a photo I had taken that was used to create the cover of my 1971 High School Yearbook, was analogous to Ava's overall structure. The photo shows a series of light and dark spots, which viewed closely, all you see, are multiple random appearing dots. But when this is viewed all at once from a distance, the dots suggest a recognizable picture of a person. Each of the dots represents an individual conscious part of the overall entity, Ava. 

Ava, viewed from a distance appears to be one individual. But as you look more closely you see each of the smaller parts of her, which are also unique individuals tied to her. I am one of Ava's unique individual conscious patterns, still here in learning mode. My overall goal, and her goal for me, is to become complete so I can return to her. This is her goal as much as mine because she can't progress on her path until she is complete.

Ava, is this anywhere close to what is true?

            It is a general but adequate representation, good enough for now.

Ava, would you like to add anything more today? Other than the verification that I had an adequate grasp of the above comments, I sense that this is enough for today.

Monday, March 5, 2018

I have been writing elsewhere for a short time and wanted to see if Ava had anything to say.

Hello Ava. I acknowledge that I feel a quick response from her. I had a thought about where Ava would like to start this, and if she is willing to try it, I will open things up to her.

            The first thing is that you all should know that you are much more than your physical body. In fact, the physical body is the least of what you are. Your true nature is that you are a spiritual being, separate from that which you know as your physical world. There are many other places and dimensions wierhe you have access that you can learn and grow. Your physical world is only one of them. It may seem the most important to you, since that is your current home, but too close a focous on this point limits you – It impedes and blocks knowledge of your true nature.

            You are non-ophysical beings. That is important. What is more important is that you can and do persist after that physical form you are so attached to has its end. You were here before this life, and you will reutn here when you are complete.

At this point, I am not able to interpret her thoughts any further. What she has said, I know, only touches the surface of the discussion. I don’t feel her presence now. 

Monday, March 19, 2018

Just so you don’t think this is totally new to me, I have had experiences all my life that I believe have been influenced by Ava. The only real new thing is that I had not until now known her name.  It has made the experiences I always have had, a bit more personal. I had been referring to the Ava entity as some intelligent glowing sphere of energy; the cosmic equivalent to “Hey You!” Not that this seemed to bother her/it. The experiences I have had did not seem impacted. I may from time to time insert an experience or two here just to illustrate. But, knowing her name has changed the experience for me.

Ava, are you here with me today? Well, I was just checking. I know she is always here. But I know too that I am not the only interest she has in this game. Even so, she would be here instantly if she needed to make a point one way or another or help me. And, I also have to admit that contact in one of my writing sessions would be easier to initiate if I was able to write more regularly or on any sort of sustained schedule.

Then again, it could be that Ava only wants me to say as much as I have said, from her at least. We will see. 

Yet more chanting

Just a note to myself that last night it happened again with chanting.  This time I got more detail about what I saw during the time I was chanting. It does not really help me to see detail that does not mean anything to me.  But, it is interesting in some ways that the pattern of chanting and not going any "place" is becoming ingrained in me.

Here I am chanting again. . . Aum namah Shivaya and Aum

Aum namah Shivaya- and Aum is a very powerful combination chant for me while in a slightly different stage of conscious awareness.  I have not had any memorable experience of any kind since last February.

This experience started after I had already been asleep for a while and had awakened to find that I could not fall asleep again.  I was aware of laying there and suddenly I was hit by some force or other that knocked me sideways. I felt as if I was tumbling, but I was also aware of my body in bed still in the covers with my arms at my sides.  I was aware of the signal (?) I have heard before that my awareness had shifted, but it seems at this stage that I have to grab onto this signal, so to speak, to have any experience at all. In the past, this having to grab the signal has been hard. This time, my instinct was to chant Aum namah Shivaya- Aum namah on each inhalation, and Shivaya on each exhale.  Doing this seemed to grab that awareness of elsewhere and bring it more into focus.

This time, all of my sensations were much lower in frequency than past experiences where I had usually tried for higher and smoother vibrations.  These are low to the point of being aware of individual vibrating molecules.  None of this is easily described.  The chant of Aum namah Shivaya focused the power.  Putting this chant into more of a melodic chant helped increase the focus.  Dropping it occasionally to simply Aum seemed to draw the focus of energy more into my brain. I just remembered that early on in this, I could almost feel my lips moving in the chanting and was aware of my vocal chords moving.  At the same time I knew this was not really happening physically.  

The chant of Aum brought the energy higher into my head and I could see what looked like two arms in my field of vision.  On each arm was a hand but the hands were in some sort of special position that I knew at the time had some special meaning and purpose that I could not quite get hold of then.  Still chanting Aum, the energy seemed to reach a peak, and then one of the hands reached out and softly touched the middle of my forehead just a bit above the bridge of my nose.   At this point, the arms parted and I could see a clear and starry night. I could feel the energy winding down slowly. The starry night became a clear sunny day with a typical house in my view.  I could hear the voices of what may have been the residents of the home.  And then that faded as the energy continued to drop back into my every day awareness.  It took a number of minutes even at this point to get my eyes open and to feel like I could move.  And then, I just laid there awake again for the next hour wondering about it all.

Chanting Aum namah Shivaya- and Aum

This one started with my more typical aum namah Shivaya chant, but as it started I dropped it to just the more simple Aum, and noticed right away that it seemed to add a bit of power to the proceedings.  I had started earlier in the night as I was going to sleep by chanting aum namah Shivaya as I breathed. This was inhale on aum namah  and exhale on Shivaya.  This tends to get me focused and relaxed.  As I realized the vibration energy was starting- or as I got aware of it in any case, I briefly repeated the aum namah Shivaya.  I started to float a bit, and switched to Aum.  The increase in energy compared to the longer chant was quite fast and overwhelming to say the least.

Oddly, I lost control a bit as I was not sure where I was or why. It is not like I thought of anything, or wanted to go any one place.  I found myself landing very solidly on my back on a very hard floor in a closet or store room.  I felt that I was physically in the place.  I was afraid someone had seen me, but as it happened the door was closed.  As I stood up, I heard my shoes squeaking on this floor.  I sneaked out through the door, and found myself in an office setting. If anyone saw me, they did not react, so maybe whoever I was there was expected to be there.

The last time before this, I had stuck to the ”aum namah Shivaya”  chanting. I remained quite focused on it.   I heard voices speaking but could not quite focus enough to decipher what they were saying.  I saw what appeared to be a lattice work of compartments with individual people.  The impression was that the compartments were on the interior of a cylinder that I was floating in.  As I floated and rotated, I saw the people in this latticework.  Maybe it was some sort of gateway to other planes?  No one was there to tell me except maybe the voices.  And I could not follow what they were saying.

A Dream of a past OOBE

This was not any sort of lucid dream. I remember very little of what happened in a dream until I was near a group of people who were talking to each other. I did not know anyone there but started to listen because they seemed to be talking about other-realms in the non-physical planes.   I sort of budded in and told them I had had an experience close to what they were talking about.  This one was one way early in this blog, called   Confrontation   .

This is pretty weird to me that I could be dreaming, and tell someone in a dream the details I remember from this early OOBE from around 44 years ago.  Maybe the time is getting nearer when I will remember what I had been told “out there”?

Just Heat

Now, a bit ago I had a post that was only a feeling of electricity. .  . Now I have had an OOBE-like event where I just was aware of heat.  It was almost too much heat to be comfortable.  I made an attempt to cool it off a bit, but this cooling seemed to stop the entire thing.  I remember feeling as if my legs and arms were floating free, and that I was otherwise anchored to my more physical body. I could sense the heat in waves coming over me and through me.

More in chanting mode

Last night I was awake and listening to sounds in the room that basically were interrupting my sleep at that point. I stated to see certain images as I listened to the sounds, and the more I tried to see, the more I slid into a weird awake but not quite all awake state.  It was not the same as pre-OOB, but close.  The sounds I heard kept pulling me back to awake, but I slid deeper each time I concentrated on the visuals.

Then the chanting started, and I was immersed in warmth of sound accompanying the chant. The chanting became a melody to accompany the warmth.  I was still consciously aware of my part in keeping up the chants, still the same as noted before.  Om Namah Shivaya, repeated in an ever-changing melody.  This continued for a fairly long time.  There were visuals accompanying all of this, but I do not remember what at this point.  After a long time, the canting ended.

As the chanting ended, I thought I woke up. The surroundings were not as they should be, and I awoke again, thinking I was really awake this time. Again, the events and people seemed OK for a moment, but I realized they were totally wrong eventually.  When I woke up for real, I remembered the events and wondered how I could have been confused about the reality of the first two false awakenings.  It was around an hour and a half since I had seen the time on my clock.

Just electricity

Sept 9, 2011.  1 AM

With chanting and new start sensation- There were two sessions. The first was with massive bird descending towards me. I heard very loud sounds with the chants. Then I saw a group of large birds. The birds faded as someone warned me I should stop this. The second session started and I heard three names. The only one remembered is William Marsden. Then more chanting and heard separate from my chant, a “hari Krishna” chant start up. Well, the only significance to that is that Shiva is the main devote to Krishna, maybe it would follow that chanting to Shiva would lead to hearing the chant to Krishna?  Not that I ever followed any of this really until this started happening to me. As the experience started to fade, a person near me said they wondered how I could do all of this while recovering. ? 

October 26, 2011

This is starting to move beyond what I can attempt to understand as far as what sort of significance these experiences hold. There is now no sense of vibration or sound. I am immersed in electricity. It is in me, I am it. It is me. I cannot even remember a chant initially. Just “om”. It is enough to bring such a surge of energy to and through me. The rest of the chant is added in as I remember it. The surge grows with each new repetition. There is no thought of “out of body” anything.  Why would it matter with “where” I am now- Out of what? It has no meaning.

I am losing interest in this other stuff. Why would I go out of my body? What would it prove at this point? The odd thing is that I have also lost interest in hearing about the out of body experiences of others. What a progression of experiences in my lifetime. . . What does any of it mean? 

More chanting, finally . . . or was it singing?

Just when I was starting to think that nothing would ever happen again, I found myself vibrating again. So naturally, I started to chant again. Why mess with a good thing? But it was more of a song this time. I did use the same chant as far as wording, but instead of flat out chanting, I varied it to a tune that I must have improvised. I certainly did not recognize it anyway. The result was a fascinating looping flight that varied as the melody changed. It may have been totally worthless in the long run, but it felt nice. Towards the end I finally started to have visuals with this, but they totally disrupted the feel of the experience, and it ended shortly after they started.