June 23, 2022, early morning-
I woke up last night and had a bit of trouble getting back to sleep. I decided to try an internal chant, Om Namah Shivaya. Usually, when I do this I just fall asleep which was what I intended. This time was different.
After a few repetitions, I heard other voices joining in. I kept on going and thought that I wanted this energy to go out to everyone I knew. It grew stronger, and even more, voices joined. It wasn't really anything like an OOBE sensation, but it was a general hum in the background while the chanting continued.
Then I heard a slight variation in the chant from the other voices. I don't remember exactly what it was, but it also had Om, and Shivaya included. I see from Google, that Om Shivaya Namaha is a known variation. I need a tape recorder for my mind. The “Namaha” sounds right. It is the way these were combined that I really can't remember. It was very powerful.
And, as the multitude of voices were chanting, I felt as if my arms were moving in a certain way. I am sure that means something, but I haven’t found anything online about it yet.
I don't know how long the chanting lasted. In the end, I turned to my right, and my first wife was there. Just a slight bit of background, our marriage ended on more or less friendly terms, although it ended because she wanted it to end. Over the years, I have had a new perspective of those times, and a new understanding of her reasons to end us. And I have tried to keep in touch if doing that every ten years is keeping in touch.
So, it was interesting to me that she was there, of all people. She had never talked to me before about her role in our separation. Now, she told me she was sorry, and that she had not handled things very well. I said that we were both there, and I was sure we both could have handled it better than we had.
This seems strange to me to add here, but that it happened at the close of the chanting, made it seem important. I had forgiven her back then after she had told me what had been going on with her. This moment at the end of the chanting seemed to mean that we both had taken some responsibility for our ending, and had forgiven each other.
